October 2018
I have been sharing my journey on Instagram, pretty much since I left my partner. What started as a way for me to track my progress paying off the £18500 of debt that I was left with at the end of the relationship has led me to SO many amazing, supportive, inspiring people who have been or are still going through a similar situation to me. It's become a place for me to write down my feelings, frustrations and my little victories in navigating life after domestic abuse. Sometimes, I find it really therapeutic when I'm feeling a bit helpless to go back to some older posts on my feed and take a moment to appreciate how far I've come.
At the moment, my daughter sees her father for 2 hours per week. They usually go swimming and I am always there, with a third party, so that he can't make any allegations or become abusive towards me. Prior to this, and prior to me getting the courage to apply for court, it would just be me, him and our daughter. Which, as you can imagine, did not work. But more on that later. I wanted to share a post from the last time I was with him alone with our daughter. 6 months ago.
October, 2018. St. James' Park, Southampton.
Such a beautiful October day. I'm currently at a park 45 minutes away from home, supervising contact between my child and her father, who continues to be manipulative, threatening and endlessly abusive towards me. Even today, in front of our daughter, my perfect baby who deserves the whole world. Every time he makes a comment to me she looks confused and scared and asks me for a cuddle. Yet it's my fault, of course, for stopping contact in the first place. This whole process has been exhausting and continues to completely drain me. The court process is causing me endless sleepless nights which is in turn making me ill. He continues to lie to social services about me, to threaten me with the police, to harass me when he knows I'm with my friends. All I want is for my baby to be happy. She loves spending time with her daddy, of course. But her witnessing the way he treats me and, god forbid, him treating her in the same way as she grows up makes me feel sick to my stomach. This is also a huge part of my reality and I really feel it's important to share it. I started this insta to document my progress in building a happy, stable and comfortable life for me and my little girl, i dont want to leave bits out just because its negative. Everyone has their challenges and this is mine
At the moment, my daughter sees her father for 2 hours per week. They usually go swimming and I am always there, with a third party, so that he can't make any allegations or become abusive towards me. Prior to this, and prior to me getting the courage to apply for court, it would just be me, him and our daughter. Which, as you can imagine, did not work. But more on that later. I wanted to share a post from the last time I was with him alone with our daughter. 6 months ago.
October, 2018. St. James' Park, Southampton.
Such a beautiful October day. I'm currently at a park 45 minutes away from home, supervising contact between my child and her father, who continues to be manipulative, threatening and endlessly abusive towards me. Even today, in front of our daughter, my perfect baby who deserves the whole world. Every time he makes a comment to me she looks confused and scared and asks me for a cuddle. Yet it's my fault, of course, for stopping contact in the first place. This whole process has been exhausting and continues to completely drain me. The court process is causing me endless sleepless nights which is in turn making me ill. He continues to lie to social services about me, to threaten me with the police, to harass me when he knows I'm with my friends. All I want is for my baby to be happy. She loves spending time with her daddy, of course. But her witnessing the way he treats me and, god forbid, him treating her in the same way as she grows up makes me feel sick to my stomach. This is also a huge part of my reality and I really feel it's important to share it. I started this insta to document my progress in building a happy, stable and comfortable life for me and my little girl, i dont want to leave bits out just because its negative. Everyone has their challenges and this is mine
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